FML

Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's balls." FML

FML

Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML

PAUSE!!!!!

FML

Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML

FML

Today, I finally got Wii Fit to lose some weight. Came home and set it all up only to be told that I weigh too much to use the board. FML

FML

Today, I found out why my girlfriend of 8 months has never agreed to stay the night before. Now I have a 4-month old mattress that needs replacing, and a 23-year-old bedwetter for a girlfriend. FML

FML

Today, I sent pictures to my ex of me and my new boyfriend in bed. He sent them to my dad. FML

FML

So yea...another new blog series. Pretty self-explanatory. Usually they're gonna just come from the FML site...whatever I think is worthy of being put on my blog, I will copy and paste it here. If something happens in my life that's worth a FML...i'll put that here also. So yea. Here's the first one.

Today, was my birthday. After hinting for almost 2 months for a Wii, my dad pulls out a shiny new Wii Package. The only problem? The box didn't have a Wii in it. My dad gave me a Wii box with my VCR inside and a note saying "This is life. Once you think you're happy, someone crushes it". FML